The Choice Is Ours

Choice is a big deal, a free will, ready to be activated at a moments notice. So, we all know that we ALWAYS have a choice in every single solitary aspect of our lives. There are the simple choices we make every day... what we will have for dinner, what we will watch on TV, what we will wear. Those are the easy ones and what I call ROBOTIC CHOICES, leaving little to the imagination.

Every move and thought we make in life involves a choice. And sometimes making certain decisions can be life changing, or even life threatening. Recently, the Baltimore Bay bridge was demolished when a cargo carrier rammed into it, destroying it, and killing six workers. Now I am not saying the captain of the cargo carrier had a choice in this particular tragedy, but the aftermath stirred up some stories on the news about individuals that would have been on the bridge had they left the house five minutes earlier. Then there was the 911 terrorist attack on the World Trade Center that occurred and we heard hundreds of similar stories of people that decided to take the day off work, or needed to make a stop before heading to work that day. Anyway, you get my point. I call these GOD CHOICES. The decision was made for those in these tragic situations. It really makes you think about life a little more carefully or thoughtfully, doesn't it?

I am seventy-two years old, turning seventy-three this year, God willing. Gosh, there are times when I really do feel old, and then there are times when I feel very vibrant and young. It was only yesterday that I was graduating from high school or getting married or having my first child. It was more than only yesterday... oh that time thing just gets me, which brings me to my main point. Realistically I am in the final years of my life. Don't sound so dismal you may think. It did feel dismal when I reflected on all the decisions I had made during my lifetime, some of which were not so good, downright unhealthy, or just plain stupid. I thought about the impact those choices had on my life at the time and my loved ones. I made some shitty choices, some of which I knew were NOT GOOD, NOR HEALTHY... and how some of them have impacted me my entire lifetime. Now, don't get me wrong, I did make some very good decisions too that have followed me all my life as well. I have talked to a lot of people and friends and they have shared some similar experiences with me. They had hit an age in their lives whereby they too questioned life's decisions and choices. "It's life. It's not a big deal. We all go through it." And that is as true a statement as the grass is green and the sky is blue today. All I am saying is, for me, I got a little nervous when I thought about the years that I had left and wanted to be sure I gave my choices the full attention they deserve if you get my drift. Would I change anything if I could? That would be a big fat NO! Every choice brought me to today and created the soul that I am.

But the reality of it is, I am in the best years of my life. It happened when I turned seventy if I am being honest. It hit me like a brick upside my head, knowing that I was in my seventies. It's really okay, but when I sat down with myself and thought deeply about it, I decided to live better. What I mean by that is I wanted to make careful choices to the best of my ability, making sure I think through the important ones before I take action. Now, have I really done that every single time? No, but I have made it a priority to think ahead, especially if it is going to affect something or someone important to me. I think most of us are basically good humans with good intentions. Åt least, I choose to believe that. Call me naive. It won't be the first time. I like to give everyone the benefit of the doubt. After all, who am I to judge? So, that said, let's talk.

Let's do the math. At seventy-two, I have experienced seventy-two Christmases, Easters, Thanksgivings, all the annual holidays. Duh, you can count right? But, the reality of it is... let's just say I live to be one hundred, which is my goal, I only have twenty-eight of those holidays left. That's a crazy perspective when you think about it.Taking these thoughts to the next level, I have children who live in other states and I see one of them about twice a year, and the other about once a year and that thought really puts life into perspective. Let's do the math again, assuming my numbers are true. If I live to be one hundred (fingers crossed), I will see one child only fifty-six more times in my life and the other only twenty-eight. Okay, I don't mean to depress you, but it's true. For those of you who live in the same state or town as your family, these numbers would change and you are lucky. Obviously, circumstances often dictate how our lives unfold. I am just saying that I want to make the BEST choices I can and I know we all want to do that. I am not in any way, shape or form, trying to sound like a self-help guru. I am only writing about my personal perspective on things as I see them. I would very much welcome your comments though, because it will give me more perspective (I am overusing this word), sorry. I spent the better part of my seventh year thinking about what I had missed in life and what I shoulda, coulda done differently. Believe me, I had family members remind me of that, but after I decided to stop writing my eulogy, I shifted gears and gave myself permission to live it up. That was my conscious choice and I will call it just that. CONSCIOUS CHOICES.

How many decisions does the average person make in a day? Well, data says we make between 33,000 to 35,000 choices a day. Holy cow! Many of these happen automatically and sometimes along with other decisions. But some choices are more important and life changing and the little ones can lead up to the bigger ones. Many choices we make have a major impact on others, e.g., our children, our spouses, family members, our coworkers. Sometimes it's hard to know how our choices will impact other situations and in those cases, we often times learn some very hard lessons. And that's okay. Life is hard. Life is sometimes messy. That is also okay. We cannot always know the outcome of our choices, but we can try to thoughtfully make them.

I have reached a point in my life, a little wiser, I hope, and I want to make choices that are more fun. I am less concerned about other peoples opinions, less self conscious, and after all, you only live once. Hey, I have twenty eight years left. Ha Ha! Have you thought about what choices will make you happy, bring you joy, make you giggle a little? I am a creative. I actually think every single person on the planet is a "creative". We all have creative gifts in us. I may have some that you don't and vice versa. I want to learn from you and I want you to learn from me. Let's all take some time to make choices that make us happy and bring us joy. Don't sweat the small stuff. Even happiness is a choice on our worst days!

I love you all and thank you for stopping by! xo

Leslie